The Dirt Field

I just made an appointment to get Kobe neutered next Monday. I’m petrified that I’m going to drop off my swaggering, lovable Shiba Inu and pick up an irritable, resentful cur in a skirt. This is something I should have done when he was a puppy, but I wasn’t exactly flush with cash back in those days and as time passed, I became more and more afraid that the procedure would change his personality. Then I became obsessed with the idea of breeding Kobe and creating dozens of little Kobes that I could use to fill the rooms of my new condo. (Bobby probably just fell over dead with horror at that idea.) Now I’ve realized that another puppy is not in my future and therefore, the ball must drop. Or balls. I’m really anxious. Will he still be my little fluffywampums? Will he still stick up for me when strangers come around? Can I sell his discarded testes on eBay?