The Dirt Field

The Race: Big Bear Lake Time Trial
The Course: 7.8 miles of rolling, winding road
The Field: 1/2 women
The Finish: 51st

This race didn’t go as well as I had hoped. My team didn’t have time to preview the course before the race, I had to use my road bike for the event since I didn’t get to try using a TT bike beforehand, the course was at 6800 feet and the altitude made it feel like I was sucking in bits of glass with every breath, etc. These feel like excuses, but they’re just facts. What is also a fact is that I just did not feel good. I can figure out reasons for why I didn’t feel as strong as I could have and they are all due to my mistakes and bad choices. When my coach says ride for 1.5 hours, I ride for 2 because I’m compulsive and stubborn. I know sleep is critical, but I stay up too late day after day while knowing my body won’t ever let me sleep in. I’ve made choices in life lately that add emotional and life stress, choices I should have handled differently. I chose to enter a training race less than two weeks ago that left me with a cracked rib and a mild concussion. Now I look back at these mistakes and cringe, both because they were all preventable and because I was too cocky and believed that I could handle each mini-handicap without any ill effect. But if you put enough bricks together, you’ve built a wall.

I am disappointed in myself, not so much for 51st place, but for not being smarter about the things that came before yesterday’s start. That changes now.

Today is another day and another race. Yesterday isn’t behind me fully yet and I don’t think it should be – learning experiences need to sting until the lesson is learned, and I still need to keep reminding myself that overtraining, overstressing, overtaxing myself is going to hurt my riding. If nothing else, my team deserves better than a rider that shows up to events at less than 100%.

Speaking of that team, congratulations to Laura Brown for kicking ass and taking an impressive 12th place in yesterday’s TT. With no prior knowledge of the course, she went out there, tore it up, and impressed us all. Jamie Dinkins Bookwalter also brought home an impressive 24th place. Now it’s onto the City of Beaumont Road Race today.