Absence Makes The Heart Grow….Fonder.

Posted on by lindsay
At 7:30 am last Sunday morning, while barefoot and wearing my bathrobe and my 'three hours of sleep after a long night out' hair, I dropped Paul off at the airport. He was headed to Chicago on a business trip, and is not scheduled to return until tomorrow evening. In his absence, I have learned a few valuable lessons:1. Without Paul, certain tasks will never get done around the house. I mean NEVER. For example, I ran out of paper towels on Sunday evening. I am still out of paper towels, and will most definitely remain out of paper towels until Paul returns and goes to the grocery store. I have used actual towels and toilet paper instead, and would probably use my own hair or underwear before going and purchasing paper towels myself. Additionally, I filled up the kitchen trash can on Sunday morning and put the bag outside ...continue reading.

Well, OBVIOUSLY.

Posted on by lindsay
My mother in law is well-acquainted with my lack of culinary skills. While I see it is an unwillingness, she views it is an inability that merely needs to be corrected. So tonight, after I complimented her on the mashed potatoes she was making, she called me over to see how it was done. Assuming I knew the basics, she showed me the butter and the milk she was mixing in, and concluded her instructions.Then, as I stared down into the blantantly smooth, white potatoes, I asked stupidly, "So do you peel the potatoes first?"She looked at me blankly. "Yes," she replied slowly, answering what had to have been the most obvious question ever. Realizing what she was working with here, she restarted her instructions."First you peel the potatoes, and then you cube them. Then you boil them until they are soft, and then you mash them with the beaters, ...continue reading.

Apology for a Redolent Breakfast

Posted on by lindsay
I have a confession to make to my fellow officemates: I am the person who is polluting the office with ‘food smell’ at 9:15 in the morning. There was leftover Thai from Wednesday’s lunch in the company fridge, and even though I wasn’t the least bit hungry, it sounded delicious, so I microwaved it and smuggled it to my desk to shovel down in front of my computer. I’m sorry; I know nobody likes the smell of actual food in the morning. The morning should be reserved for the fresh aromas of coffee and bacon and pastries, and here I am, subjecting all of you chicken in red curry. Even more heinous is the fact that this is not a new crime for me. At my former job at the court, I used to heat up and devour leftover Thai or Chinese right when I got to work at 8:00am ...continue reading.