Just a quick word.

Posted on by lindsay
You may have noticed that I've been writing on here less lately. It's not intentional; I've just been with preoccupied so many other things that writing for fun has become something I always think about doing and never actually do (like flossing or driving the speed limit). So what's been going on?Well, first there's school. I'm trying to finish college this month, and apparently Mason decided that they had not consumed enough of my time/money/soul in the past few years, so my last two classes have been more than compensating. I'd rather be eaten by angry slugs than write another case analysis paper, and yet there are six of them standing between me and officially graduating. Work has also been, um, fun. As law school approaches and my window of time for being gainfully employed dwindles, I've been trying to put in as many hours as possible. The result is ...continue reading.

Party Pooper

Posted on by lindsay
Today is our company president's birthday. To celebrate, his executive assistant and the head of HR arranged to have a surprise party in the lunchroom with two large sheet cakes and a catered ice cream service by Baskin Robbins. At the appointed hour, the entire company migrated to the cafeteria to enjoy the food and festivities.The only noticeable absence was the company president himself, who had apparently left the building for the day upon hearing that there was a celebration planned in his honor. This is the fifth consecutive year that this has happened.

Tsunami

Posted on by lindsay
While preparing my tea in the company lunchroom this morning, I realized that the water cooler was completely empty. I was in the middle of a conversation with Caitlin and another coworker of ours when I made this discovery, and I decided to just quickly change the five-gallon jug myself. I hauled the new water jug across the lunchroom to the cooler, and proceeded to remove the large plastic cap.Seeing what I was about to do and noticing that I was teetering around on little high heels, my coworker offered to help me. “What,” I snapped. “Do I not look manly enough? Do you think I am not capable of doing this myself?”He backed off immediately and continued to chat with Caitlin. I heaved the water jug up to the cooler, positioned it to fall neatly into place, and flipped it over.Water gushed everywhere. I somehow got the top of ...continue reading.

Iced Venti Shut The Hell Up

Posted on by lindsay
The Director of Business Development at my company came to my desk today to ask me to help him edit a proposal. He stood in my cubicle for about three seconds before pointing at a picture of Paul and I that was tacked to my wall and stating, "I know that guy. He used to work at Starbucks. THAT'S where I know you from!"I stared blankly. He knew me? And Paul? From Starbucks?We discussed the logistics of his recollection and realized that it was quite possibly true that he had been a regular customer at my old Starbucks back in the day. The reminiscing was all good and happy until he mentioned that the last time he saw me there, he had ordered three drinks and I had messed one of them up. "Oh, come on. Are you sure that was me?" I asked skeptically. I figured it was years ...continue reading.

Guilty As Charged

Posted on by lindsay
I just got caught by an intern while on a feeding frenzy in the marketing room. He burst into laughter and asked, "Are you stuffing your purse with candy?"Note: I went back to the marketing room to get more chocolate and Rice Krispie Treats, and upon seeing my return, the same intern remarked, "I have a duffel bag in my car that you are welcome to use."

Caitlin’s Take On The Issue

Posted on by lindsay
"Lindsay, we've noticed that you consistently get to work around 11, consume all of our hot chocolate, spend no less than an hour exchanging instant messages, take an hour and a half lunch break, empty our water coolers, read fictional novels at your desk during the rare occasions we find you there, print hundreds of pages of personal documents, socialize endlessly with your coworkers, and leave at 5. Have you considered upper management?"